How to leverage your monopoly of one

Chances are:
You’ve suppressed, forgotten, or have overridden certain inclinations you once had growing up.

You were pulled by certain fields and hated others.
You were inspired by certain people and ignored others.
You were gripped by certain books and slept through others.

Long before the desires of others were imposed onto you, your interests were of an involuntary nature, as if things of the world demanded your attention, as if they specifically called to you.

A kind of pre-existing connection that bridged the external with the internal world.

What tends to happen for most of us, is we are dissuaded from pursuing those natural inclinations and are instead, pushed onto paths that go directly against everything that makes us unique.

Even more challenging is that these external pressures often come from a place of love.

The concern from our parents,
The care from our professors,
The connections with our peers.

The temptation can be so powerful, that the odds of a heroic rebellion are practically zero.

Before you can blink, we go from cradle to cubicle to casket without ever knowing who we truly are, what we could have achieved, or what our true purpose is in this short game we call life.

To begin reversing this false narrative, there are 2 steps:

First, to thank the world for civilizing us through culture, traditions, and social norms – but recognize that the perks of social civility come at the expense of our individuality.

Second, to actively rebel against these forces – not in the spirit of bitterness – but in the way the student succeeds the master.

Nietzsche put it best in his three metamorphic stages of self-overcoming, which goes as follows:

The Camel

In this initial stage, the individual resembles a camel burdened with the weight of societal and cultural expectations, norms, and values.

The majority of people live and die as “disgruntled beasts of burden,” often without ever questioning or challenging the status quo.

The Lion

After carrying the burden of societal expectations, the individual reaches a point where they roar a triumphant “NO” against the Dragon of tradition. The lion represents rebellion and the spirit of negation.

But like breaking out of the prison they once called home, the lion confronts a new challenge out in the wilderness. One of lawlessness, anarchy, and complete disorientation.

The Child

After conquering the inner “Yes man” (camel) and graduating to the rebellious contrarian (lion), the individual must undergo a final transformation – the child.

They must once again re-affirm the world through their creative re-evaluation of values and ability to playfully engage with life.

The child is no longer burdened by the weight of external pressure or negating what life offers. They are active voluntary players in the game of life.

Think of it like this:

We’re each born unique, creative, and full of potential.

But our chaotic, self-centred, and childish nature demands civility through culture and rationality through formal education.

Afterwards, we each enter a crucial transition as young adults.

A “rite of passage” that demands us to rebel, rediscover, and reconnect to our “inner child,” now with the added gift of responsibility.

We become both the man and the boy, the woman and the girl.

Let’s break down this transitional phase further by examining the key ingredients necessary in the transformative process.

Leveraging your Monopoly of One

There is quite literally, no one on the planet who is more qualified at being you than you.

You own a true one-of-a-kind monopoly of one, not taking advantage of the innate quirks and qualities you possess would be insane.

Socrates famously said:

So to live up to the wise man’s expectations, our focus will be on the examination of three key pillars that align with our core nature, forming a foundation from which we can build our ideal self.

A mistake that I and many people make is rushing to construct dreams that are built on unstable ground. This is a surefire way to see everything crumble the second life decides to test you – and it most definitely will.

Note that each pillar will be expanded upon in my upcoming digital product — The North Star. These are just introductions.

Strengths: Your unfair advantage

We live in a world obsessed with “working on your weaknesses” rather than playing to your strengths.

Don’t get me wrong, we must all be aware of our weaknesses, but at its fundamentally flawed core, the aim of almost any course, curriculum, or program is to mould you into someone you are not.

If you don’t have a natural talent for numbers, you’re still forced to spend time in that area to get that degree.

If you’re the disagreeable type, you’re seen as coldhearted and sent to those workshops designed to infuse empathy into your personality.

We invest so much time, energy, and resources into our shortcomings – the path of most resistance – rather than nurturing our natural strengths – the path of least resistance.

This pillar focuses on harnessing your unfair advantages in the marketplace.

Curiosity: Your keys to obsession

I always find it ironic that we are encouraged to “question everything” as children, but as soon as we come of age, all of a sudden “it’s time to get realistic.”

The day you stop questioning is the day you stop getting answers.
The day you stop getting answers is the day you stop learning.
The day you stop learning is the day you stop growing.
The day you stop growing is the day you start dying.

Curiosity is the fuel that turns interests into obsessions.

A million things can be interesting, but only few possess a kind of power that can elicit an undying investigative inquiry.

It is our natural fuel that enables you to learn far more than the average “lukewarm” person.
It is what impels you to go 2-steps further than your strongest competitor.
It is the edge you have that makes work feel like endless play.

This pillar focuses on discovering your keys to obsession.

Values: Your inner compass

A friend of mine once told me of the time he had a near-death experience.

You’ve probably heard the “life flashed before my eyes” that most people talk about, but how he described it left an impression I’ll never forget.

I paraphrase but it went something along the lines of:

“It wasn’t so much my entire life flashed before me, it was everything I valued that did – and along with that, all the regrets of what I hadn’t done with my life.”

I always remind myself that one day my life will flash before me, and I pray I see all the things that made it all worth it.

Values are what you find most important in life, plain and simple.

They are the magnetic forces that guide the needle of our inner compass, as we navigate towards what truly matters. What’s the point of navigating at all if you don’t have a reason?

This pillar focuses on getting in touch with your inner compass.

By infusing each pillar through self-awareness, we begin to build a kind of “holy trinity” that acts as a foundation we can build on top of — this is how you chase dreams that are actually yours and walk a unique path by your design.

But that’s next week’s topic, stay tuned.

— Mat